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  • Harry Jensen

March 9, 2021


I had therapy today. Progress was slow, as I was so overcome obsessive-compulsive behaviors that I almost slammed my coffee mug through my skull. I resisted, because I hadn’t finish my Americano yet. Waste not want not.

Forrest and I are doing work within the paradigms of Internal Family Systems, an approach that considers the mind to be a dysfunctional congregation of discrete subpersonalities vying for control, all with their own ideas of how to care of the true self. In short, a family.

I have taken to giving my little voices fanciful names, which has resulted in weekly sessions of what feels like a chaotic and very expensive Dungeons and Dragons session.

“So the Worldbuilder wants to make you impossibly great, and to write all day until you die of exhaustion,” Forrest summarizes, “but the Constituent is an exhausted little fourth grader who just wants to be nuzzled and taken care of, yes?”

“Yeah, but his name is Worldmaker,” I mumble, my eyes closed as I try to sift through these mini-mes like I’m panning for pyrite in the dark.

After therapy, I slammed some kratom and drank a little red wine, then I went to White Castle to really test my mental mettle. I had second thoughts as soon as I pulled into the drive-thru, but the curbs raised around the line make one have to literally backout of their terrible decision. In the end, I demurred from demurring and ordered the Mix Six. Here is my judgement.

Mix Six for $6 Review

· The Bacon Cheese Slider tastes like a slab of butter dragged across a barnyard.

· The Chicken Ring Slider tastes like a slab of butter dragged across a barnyard littered with dead turkeys.

· The Panko Fish Slider tastes like a slab of butter dragged through the Gulf of Mexico.

· The Seafood Crab Cake Slider tastes like a slab of butter dragged through a fancier pocket of the Gulf of Mexico, one where a truckload of gourmet barnyard turkeys drowned.

The Worldmaker is not going to be happy in the morning.


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